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March Of The Van Dykes

from Hollywood In The 80s by Kevin Lamb & Peter Stone

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about

Inspired by the constant messages I received on my answering machine in my new apt. in Marina Del Rey which were all for Dick Van Dyke and his wife who apparently dumped their phone number (a burner home line) and I ended up getting it. That meant 24-48 calls a day, all hours of the day, for people looking for Dick.

Well, we made a NEW outgoing message explaining how "Hi, Dick or his wife can't come to the phone right now because we have them tied up in the closet with the lights off. They're ok as we're feeding them a steady diet of Top Ramen and ACID. We will release them once you stop calling this number."

Well sure as shit, a week later we start getting a barrage of messages from Dick and his wife demanding we take the message off the answering machine with Dick's wife even impersonating a police officer (O'Day) demanding we take it off.

Realizing Dick of all people lacked a sense of humor, I did remove the message and request a new phone number but not before one night while overdosing on caffeine and Raffallo's sausage rat brain pizza, we popped this baby out. Sampled Sam Kinison and some select phrases from Dick and the little woman on the Waveterm, used two cassette players to real-time play the rest of the various background musical pieces and mastered it all to HiFi VHS and yes.. back to the outgoing message for a month before the line was changed.

credits

from Hollywood In The 80s, released August 18, 2021
K Lamb / P Stone

license

all rights reserved

tags

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